How to Give Effective Instructions
Ever given someone instructions and asked, "Do you understand"… only to find out later that it was done wrong? I think we all have.
When someone says I understand, what the person is really saying is
1. I do understand.
2. I think I understand
3. I haven't got a clue but I don't want to say so.
Here's how to gain cooperation, compliance and get it done right and prevent frustration, anger and resentment:
· Decide specifically what you want done.
· Get the person's attention and make direct eye contact.
· Tell him in complete detail what is an acceptable outcome and what to do. Give clear, concise and congruent directions in a direct and confident manner… offer a choice in how to do it if possible. Be sure to mention why as well as how… especially if you want him to do it differently than he is currently doing it.
· Show him how to do it.
· Ask if he has any questions.
· Restate your instructions one more time if necessary then watch to make sure he begins and watch him do it.
· Be available to answer questions if he has never done it before and give written instructions to refer to.
· Praise him when he does the task quickly and well. "You did a great job with..."
If he doesn't do it well, ask: "How did I tell you to do this?" "What is an acceptable outcome?" When he answers correctly, say, "Good, now please do it." Use facial expressions and an appropriate tone of voice to convey your disapproval with his actions.
· Stay focused on what you want or need and not on what was done.
· If he doesn't finish or do it, then he doesn't do another thing until the task is completed. You must decide the consequence for not doing it and explain that this will be necessary because of his failure to do so.
· Give him the opportunity to complete the task and praise him if it's completed satisfactorily.
. If he still doesn't comply enact the consequence reinforcing it's not what you want to do… it's a result of his behavior. Remain calm and unemotional, computer-like, when you implement consequences.
This might seem time-intensive but consider the time it takes to redo it... not to mention the strain on the relationship involved.
