Conflict
Seneca, "A man who suffers before it is necessary, suffers more than is necessary."
"He doesn't care about anyone but himself." "Why can't we all just get along?" "Why are we always fighting?" Do these sound familiar?
Conflict is part of everyday life and is present in every active, productive work environment.
Conflict is what you make it - good when individuals view each other as unique with diverse points of view and bad when individuals view each other as adversaries.
Instead of wishing you could all get along, start wishing you were better at dealing with others when you're not getting along? Learn to focus on the issues and not the personalities.
Conflict results from different needs, values and methods of implementation and is in response to growth, innovation and change. It offers many benefits for you, your relationships and your organization… the greatest of which is a diversity of perspectives.
Communication, relationships, conflict and productivity are closely connected. When communication is positive, relationships are strong, conflict is issue focused and productivity high. When communication is negative, relationships are weak, conflict is personality focused and productivity low.
Which is better? The first of course.
Here's a 5X5 plan for conflict management: five preventive measures, five steps to resolve, five strategies, five ground rules and five training's.
Five preventative measures:
1. Anticipate others reactions.
2. Encourage open sharing of thoughts and feelings.
3. Establish clear expectations.
4. Provide regular feedback regarding performance.
5. Collaborate whenever possible.
Five steps to resolve:
1. Assume the responsibility.
2. Define the problem.
3. Ask questions and listen.
4. Create goals and plans.
5. Follow up.
Five strategies.
1. Avoid it.
2. Accomodate by giving in completely or partly.
3. Collaborate by finding a jointly agreed on alternatives.
4. Compromise where all concerned parties concede something.
5. Compete as a last resort.
Five ground rules:
1. Everyone is open and honest.
2. Everyone has a say.
3. Everyone will listen and acknowledge each contribution.
4. Disagreements must be supported.
5. Feelings are important.
Five best training's:
1. Conflict resolution.
2. Personality awareness.
3. Assertiveness.
4. Communication.
5. Diversity.
CONFLICT
Think of the word conflict as an acronym for successful conflict resolution.
Concerned: Be empathetic to the other person(s) needs.
Options: Consider all solutions before choosing the best one.
Now: Deal with the issue at hand now and leave past issues out of it (unless they pertain and you have proof.)
Follow-up: People slip back into old habits without follow-up
Listen: Acknowledge everyone's point of view
Inquire: Clarify what others say to avoid misunderstanding
Contract: physical - smile or shake hands, document - put it in writing
Together: Collaboration is the best approach
Mark Twain said, "It ain't what you know, its what you think you know that just ain't so!" Make sure you know what the conflict is about and you understand the other person's point of view before deciding on
